The STARPoints Blog

October 31, 2013

#1 Change Your Seat

busThe other day, I got a call from my good friend Elliott. He was taking a 4-hour bus ride from Washington DC to New York. Once he got on the bus, Elliott settled in his chair, took out his snacks, his IPod, and his book. He was all ready to go. A half hour into the ride, the bus stopped and picked up more passengers. This guy, this six-foot-two, two-hundred pound young kid no more than 19 or 20 years old gets on the bus and sits right next to Elliott. Not a big deal. Elliott simply makes some adjustments and they move on.

Not long into the trip this kid falls asleep and he’s leaning all over Elliott’s neck and shoulders. Now Elliott is a small- framed man, five-ten, about 150 pounds and this great, big kid keeps leaning into his space. Elliott asked him to move over a couple of times, but the kid just kept falling asleep. By the time Elliott calls me, he’s just disgusted.

So I ask him, “Are there any other seats around you?” And he says, “Yeah there are some empty seats.” Then I asked him, “Why don’t you just move?” “Star, I don’t want to move, I’m comfortable here. I was here first. I got myself all set up and I’m comfortable, and I don’t want to move.” I said, “Elliott, you don’t sound like you’re comfortable. You may have been there first, and got your stuff out, and got settled, but you don’t sound comfortable.” I eventually convinced Elliott to move to a new seat and ended up having a wonderful conversation with a woman all the way into New York.

Here is the point in all this. Many times resist change under the guise of being comfortable just because we were there first or we’ve been there a while. We say we are in our comfort zone but sometimes our comfort zone is not comfortable at all. If you find yourself in a place where you’re not getting what you want or you’re not feeling happy, move Just move to a different seat, there might be something much more pleasant in store for you.

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